Challenges of Early Parenthood

Did you know that in the first 6 months of parenthood a mothers’ workload increases by 67% and a fathers’ by 37%? Those numbers are astounding to me. Planning before the baby is born is essential and it is important to be aware of the additional workload and decreased time alone.  

Some ways to prepare on the mothers' part can include:

• Involve husband in pre-natal check-ups
• Engage father in the fetal kicks
• Assuring that the father precedes over others during the birth (ex. wife’s mother or mother-in-law)

I think it is important to involve the father early on so it is not just a mother-baby relationship but also a family relationship (father, mother and child).

Another thing a couple can do to plan for the arrival of a baby is to discuss the changes that will occur after the little one is born.  This can be done by anticipating how you will share the responsibilities as parents.

It can be easy to get caught up with taking care of the baby or other responsibilities in which the spouse is then forgotten, some ideas to grow closer during the challenges of parenthood can be:

• Planning carefully for the changes for each individual
• Do not forget about your spouses needs
• Look for opportunities to boost and support each other
• Take turns with both fun and not fun tasks
• Express love and appreciation freely and frequently

I hope you enjoyed reading my tips and thoughts on what the challenges of early parenthood can be!

Dating vs. Hanging Out

When you socialize with the opposite gender, do you consider that handing out or going on a date? This was apart of our class discussion last week and I felt impressed to write about the topic...

First dating, dating consists of the three p’s; Planned, Paired off and Paid for. Planned – the date should be planned out; it’s as simple as that. Not having a planned date can also show your date that you’re not putting time or preparation into them therefore not demonstrating an actual interest. Paired off – When asked on a group date that person who asked you on the date will be the person you spend your time with. Each couple needs to be paired off so there is no confusion of who is on the date with whom. Paid for – this doesn’t mean that each date has to be an extravagant thing. However, the person asking their date on a date needs to have the date ready and if something does need to be paid for is paid for.

Second is hanging out, hanging out is generally when sexual temptations can come into play and its not a time where others can “get to know each other better”.

If you have any questions or comments, please do so below!

Understanding same-sex attraction and differences between female and male

Understanding same-sex attraction:

This week’s class discussion topic was rather informative. Did you know that young boys need a fatherly role model and need to be accepted by their peers. This is essential for a boy’s self-esteem. When they don’t have that role model or same gender peers they begin to think differently of themselves; they begin to think they are not categorized as a “boy” therefore, they must be a “girl”, hence same gender attraction. Many contributing factors can be apart of same gender attraction but this one in particular really stood out to me.

Differences in female vs. male:

Females: (tend to be)

   More nurturing

   Sensitive or caring

   Emotional or expressive

   Cooperative

   Verbal

Males: (tend to be)

   Protective

   Disciplinary

   Aggressive (physically)

   Competitive

This list seems so stereotypical. We have differences and if you have more traits of the opposite gender people may perceive you as “gay” or “lesbian”.  Looking from a married women’s perspective, wouldn’t it be nice to have a husband who is more nurturing, sensitive, expressive or verbal? Most people would see that as, oh, he must be gay if he has those traits. Whether female or male we all have differences and we shouldn’t be described as a female or male based on what traits we have. 

I know this subject can be a little touchy for some but I hope you enjoyed reading what I had to say!

Truth and Tolerance

This past week I learned about truth and tolerance.  We all have our truths or something we believe but it is important to have tolerance towards others. Tolerance is defined as a fair attitude towards unfamiliar opinions or practices. For example, I have tolerance towards parents who allow their children to have a TV in their room.  I definitely don’t think that children should have TV’s in their rooms but it is not my place to judge the parents or tell them that what they are allowing is wrong. We live in a world where there are so many different cultures and practices that we are surrounded by unfamiliar opinions and practices. When we are tolerant of others there won’t be contention and we can all get along.

If you would like to know more about truth and tolerance, I encourage you to read the talk by Elder Dallin H. Oaks called “Truth and Tolerance”.  It is a great one!